Stepping out into bright sunlight after the cold and general strangeness of travelling through the wormhole was always a surprise, even though SG1 had seen the pictures sent back by the MALP before the mission was given a go. "Spread out people," said Jack O'Neill, noting that, as he headed down the steps in front of the 'Gate, his team had automatically done just that when they exited the wormhole. "Looks quiet alright, but let's take no chances." In the distance, they could see the smoke of a cooking fire drifting up from a small settlement by the edge of the trees, yet there was no indication that the inhabitants ever visited the 'Gate itself. The surrounding grass was knee-length, and there were no tracks leading across the grassland. Half-turning towards Daniel Jackson, Jack could see that he was already looking in the direction of the settlement, and waited for him to speak. From the expression on Daniel's face, Jack guessed it would not be long before he asked when they would be making contact with the inhabitants of this planet. "Jack," said Daniel. Jack suppressed a smile, turning to Daniel with a look that said what? "Don't you think that we..." Jack jumped in, finishing the sentence for him, "..ought to meet the neighbours? Sure, we can do that." "I really hate it when you..." "...finish your sentences for you? Yeah, Danny, I know you do," said Jack with a grin. Shrugging, Daniel turned away, looking again in the direction of the tendrils of smoke. "Let's go then," said Jack, gesturing Daniel to accompany him to the settlement. "Teal'c, Carter, I want you to secure the area - I'm still not convinced that everything is as peaceful as it looks." "Sir?" asked Carter, conveying vast amounts with just that one word. "Just a feeling Captain, so you get to check it out. Daniel, let's go." With that, Jack turned away from the 'Gate and headed towards the trees, pushing his way through the knee-high grass, with Daniel following. ------------------------------ As they neared the settlement, the inhabitants emerged from the group of buildings - in contrast to the reception they often received, Daniel and Jack found themselves greeted with warmth and friendly feeling, all of which seemed sincere. "Greetings, friends," said a tall grey-haired man as he emerged from the largest of the small group of huts,"you are welcome to this place. My name is Jolik, I am the leader of this community - we do not receive many visitors." With that he stood beside the entrance to the hut, gesturing that they should go in. With a glance at Jack, Daniel led the way into the hut, speaking to Jolik as he passed him. "Hi, I'm.. er...Daniel, Daniel Jackson, and this," Daniel said, indicating Jack,"is Colonel O'Neill." "Charmed, I'm sure," said Jack, taking off his sunglasses as his eyes began to adjust to the dimness of the hut's interior. "Please be seated friends," said Jolik,"may we offer you some refreshment? Everything we have is yours, you have only to ask." "Thank you, but no," said Jack, jumping in before Daniel could speak, which earned him a glare from his friend. "Can I ask you a question about this place? Have you ever heard of the Goa'uld?" Jolik's face was blank, answering the question before he spoke, "...no, that word means nothing to me, but, as I said, we do not receive many visitors." "Are there other settlements like this elsewhere on your world?" asked Daniel, who had settled himself on a nearby bench, and was now leaning forward intently listening to the conversation. "There are, friend Daniel Jackson, but they are many days journey from here - I myself have visited the nearest settlement, but I have never heard of anyone travelling any further. Why would anyone need to? We have everything we need right here - it would be foolish to go looking for something that we already have!" "But how do you defend yourselves?" Jack inquired, still mulling over the implications of a life-style where no-one wanted to leave the place they lived, as they considered themselves to have all they needed. "Defend ourselves?" Jolik sounded a little confused. "What would we need to defend ourselves against?" "There are these people," Jack began with a degree of irritation plain in his voice,"I already mentioned them, they're called the Goa'uld. They'd like nothing better than to come here, and take you all away to be their slaves, so that's who you need to defend yourselves against!" Jolik now looked confused. He was silent for a moment, before saying "...but why should they come here? We would be no use to them - everything we need is right here, so why should we go anywhere else?" Daniel interrupted Jack this time, aware that Jolik's attitude was beginning to frustrate the colonel, saying "...so there aren't any dangerous animals here? And the settlements do not fight between themselves?" "Animals? No, I have never heard of any. Why would we fight against others? What would it achieve? After all, we..." "...have everything we need." Jack finished Jolik's sentence for him. "Yeah, you said." Turning to Daniel, Jack snapped," Let's go Daniel, there's nothing to be gained by talking to these people any longer." Putting on his sunglasses, and adjusting the position of the strap for his automatic weapon, Jack abruptly left the hut, stepping back into the sunshine. "I'm sorry, Jolik," said Daniel, "it seems we are leaving." As he spoke, Daniel was backing towards the doorway, torn between following Jack and staying to talk further with these people. "I have so many questions I would like to ask you..." "DANIEL!" "...but I really have to be leaving now. Maybe some other time..." Outside the hut, Jack was waiting for him, impatiently tapping the fingers of one hand on his gun. Seeing Daniel emerge from the hut alone, Jack turned imperiously and headed out of the settlement, back towards the 'Gate. From the way that Jack was walking, the set of his shoulders, and his silence, Daniel could tell he was angry and getting angrier by the minute. Once they had got out of earshot of the locals, Jack turned on Daniel. "Well, that was a complete waste of time! Not only are they not afraid of anything, they're too stupid to realise how much danger they are in from the Goa'uld. Serve them right if the Goa'uld do turn up and take them all away!" "Why are you so angry about this? You know we can't always know what kind of reception we are going to get from the inhabitants - at least they weren't hostile towards us!" Daniel addressed his comments to Jack's back, as Jack was still hurriedly pushing through the long grass back to the 'Gate. Daniel tried to keep up, but soon found himself falling behind - finally he tripped on an hidden root, and measured his length in the grass. As Daniel lay there in the grass, winded, a shadow fell across him. It was Jack, his face contorted with fury, who reached down to grab Daniel by the sleeve of his jacket and haul him roughly to his feet. "For crying out loud, Jackson," Jack snarled,"for once, can't you look where you're going?" All the time he was speaking, Jack still kept a grip on Daniel's sleeve, a grip which, Daniel noticed, was starting to become painful. Jack's face showed his emotions clearly , and all at once, Daniel was afraid that the colonel would strike him. "Jack," Daniel said tentatively,"could you let go of my arm? Please?" Jack glanced down at the hand which was still fisted in Daniel's sleeve, as if it did not belong to him. Slowly, the grip on Daniel's arm relaxed slightly. I'm gonna have a bruise there for certain, Daniel thought, still concerned about the anger in Jack's face. "Are you feeling okay, Jack?" "I... I'm not sure, Daniel," said Jack. "I feel like... I'm really mad at you, but I can't figure out why." Before he could say any more, there was a shout from nearby, as Teal'c and Captain Carter emerged from a hollow in the grasslands and joined them. Carter, in particular, looked curiously at how Jack and Daniel were standing - Jack still had a handful of Daniel's jacket, as if he was pulling the smaller man towards him to punch him. "Colonel, Daniel?" Carter asked quietly, "Is everything okay? What happened in the settlement? By the time we'd circled round to join you, you were already heading back towards the 'Gate..." Her voice ground to a halt, as neither Jack or Daniel had answered her. The two men were still as they had been when she first spoke to them, neither having even looked at her and Teal'c as they approached. That's odd, Carter thought, it's as though they are frozen. The colonel looks like he wants to hit Daniel and Daniel's just staring at him, not even struggling.... What could have happened? "Daniel Jackson, Colonel O'Neill." Teal'c spoke, his deep voice insistent. "I am concerned for you both - are you well?" Teal'c's voice seemed to penetrate through to the two men in a way that Carter's had failed to. Still not moving, his eyes seemingly locked together with Jack's, Daniel began to speak. "I'm not sure what's going on Teal'c... When Jack left the hut he seemed really angry, but I've no idea why. Coming back to the Stargate, I tripped - Jack came over and pulled me up and I thought he was going to hit me. Now we seem to be stuck - I can't get him to let go of my arm and I'm afraid that if I don't watch him he might...." Daniel's voice began to shake as it trailed off, but left Carter and Teal'c with no illusions about what Daniel thought Jack was capable off if he really lost his temper. "Colonel O'Neill?" Teal'c spoke again. "Teal'c?" said Jack, beginning to sound as though he was more in control of his emotions. In contrast, Daniel had begun to shake perceptibly, his face seemed to be starting to crumple, and Carter thought that he was about to start sobbing. Jack's face began to relax, the intense colour leaving it, as concern for Daniel began to take over from the anger he had been feeling up to that point. "Daniel, it's okay," said Jack, finally completely letting go of the vice-like grip he had been maintaing on Daniel's sleeve. Daniel backed hastily away from him, using the sleeve Jack had been gripping to wipe his nose, which had begun to run as he had struggled to keep from crying. He took a number of deep breaths to try to calm the terror that had been building within him. 'I really thought..' Daniel said to himself, unwilling to even admit that Jack might consciously hurt him. "What the hell is going on here?" demanded Carter. "What got you so riled up, colonel? You weren't in the settlement long enough for any of the locals to have said anything!" "Let's just get back to the 'Gate, Captain. There's nothing for us here," said Jack, with a concerned glance in Daniel's direction. "Daniel..." Jack began, walking towards him, wanting to apologise. Daniel began to back-pedal as Jack approached, with a look of fear on his face, which stopped Jack in his tracks. "Daniel, you go with Carter, okay?" "..'kay," Daniel replied, once again stifling a sob. "Teal'c, you're with me - let's go." With that Jack turned again towards the 'Gate. Teal'c and Carter exchanged curious glances, Teal'c raising an eyebrow in his usual expressive manner, before splitting up, Teal'c to accompany the colonel and Carter to get Daniel to the 'Gate. Jack tried to ignore the sounds of Daniel stumbling along behind him, still sniffing. What the hell was that? Jack asked himself. Daniel was scared... scared of me - did he really think I was going to hurt him? As Jack's mind whirled, he began to feel emotion welling up within him again, this time not anger, but guilt. What was I thinking? Daniel did nothing to me, but I was about to lay into him. How can I expect him to forgive me for that? He trusted me and I let him down - hell, he looks to me to protect him, not pound him into a pulp! By the time they had reached the 'Gate, Jack was beginning to panic. He was only aware of his feelings towards Daniel, he could only see Daniel's look of fear as Jack had approached him. Jack couldn't bring himself to speak to Daniel, not wanting to see that look again, so he spoke to Carter instead, not even turning in her direction. "Dial it up, Captain. Let's go home." Good, Jack thought, my voice didn't shake. Jack remained facing in the direction of the 'Gate, his back ramrod-stiff, as he heard Carter dialling up the coordinates for Earth on the DHD. The wormhole wooshed into existence and Jack headed up the steps as the initial surge subsided, glancing at Daniel when he turned to stop by the entrance to the vortex. "Let's hurry it up." Jack noticed that Daniel managed to position both Carter and Teal'c between himself and Jack as he moved towards the 'Gate. Can't say I blame him, Jack thought, noticing how pale Daniel looked. I'm gonna have to work hard to fix this... Once the remaining members of SG1 had passed him, Jack turned to take a final look at the planet they were leaving, before stepping into the wormhole that would take him home. __________________________________ Back at the SGC, by the time Jack had exited the wormhole, Daniel was already half-way across the embarcation room and heading hastily for the door. Jack sighed, wanting to call to him, but also afraid of what Daniel's response might be. Suppose I'd better give him some time to himself, Jack thought. "Colonel?" It was General Hammond who had spoken from where he stood at the bottom of the ramp, looking up at Jack, still standing only feet from the 'Gate itself. "Sir?" "Is everything alright, colonel? Dr Jackson looked... upset." The general had hesitated, searching for the right word to describe the expression that he had seen on Daniel's face as the archaeologist had brushed past him, almost running out of the 'Gate room. "Fine, sir," Jack lied,"we... we had a... a disagreement, on the planet." The general's face showed clearly that he was not convinced by Jack's words. Great, Jack thought, now I've got Hammond on my case too! "Debriefing in one hour, colonel. Get yourself to the infirmary," snapped the general, who continued to watch Jack carefully as he walked past him, heading towards the door. -------------------------------------- As he ran from the 'Gate room, Daniel's mind was still whirling with the thoughts that had overwhelmed him since the planet. All he had thought about, even as they had all been heading for the 'Gate, was keeping as far away from Jack as possible. All he could see was Jack's face, full of fury, full of... hatred? Hatred of him? Daniel remembered the way his heart had pounded, with the fear of what Jack might do to him, even though a small part of his mind whispered that he would be okay, that Jack wouldn't hurt him... Got to get away... Somewhere safe... Instinctively, Daniel headed for the corridors he knew so well, the maze of rooms and passages that led to his office. Occasionally, in his almost headlong flight, he would glance over his shoulder, thinking he heard footsteps behind him, only to see he was alone. This part of SGC was thinly populated, frequented only by the scientists whose labs were there, so Daniel did not really expect to see anyone else. Finally... Daniel opened the door of his office, feeling suddenly far safer than any time in the past few hours. He was still shaking, heart racing with the effort of getting there, as well as the emotions that swirled confusingly within him. Now..., he thought, ...if only I can have time to think... time to figure out what the hell happened on that planet and why I feel the way I do... Again acting more on instinct than thought, Daniel found himself curling up into the corner of the room, squashed between a cabinet full of artifacts and the wall. Though he had always had a thing about enclosed spaces, for some reason, this particular lack of space made Daniel feel safe, maybe because no-one could surprise him, sneak up on him... How did it happen? he wondered. One minute we were in the middle of a routine mission, making friendly contact with a new people, the next Jack's pulling me up from the ground with that look on his face! A sudden sound from the corridor outside made him freeze. Daniel almost held his breath as the door opened. No-one spoke. After a moment, the door closed again. From outside in the corridor, Daniel heard a brief conversation. "He in there?" a voice asked, one that Daniel didn't recognise. "Nah... ask me, the geek could be anywhere." I know that voice, Daniel thought, that's Ramirez. "Come on then," said the other voice,"better keep looking. Hammond wants him found, and soon..." The voices trailed away down the corridor. Daniel could hear their footsteps fade, along with the sound of doors being opened and closed further down the hall. Finally sure that they had gone, he began to relax again, his thoughts returning to the planet. I really thought... how could I be afraid of Jack? After all that he's done for me, letting me be part of SG1? Tears began to roll down Daniel's face, though he was unaware of them. I know how much he risks every time we step through that 'Gate, trying to keep me, the geek, safe, Daniel thought bitterly. How can I ever face him, expect him to let me stay as part of his team, when he must know that I was terrified of him? I saw his face... he knew... __________________________________ When Jack arrived at the infirmary, he found Carter and Teal'c already there - Daniel was conspicuous by his absence. When he had opened the door, both Carter and Teal'c's heads had turned to see who had arrived, and both looked perceptibly disappointed to see just the colonel. "Colonel?" asked Carter,"have you seen Daniel?" Jack shook his head, suddenly feeling the guilt he had experienced earlier pressing down on him once again. Carter had a worried expression on her face and even Teal'c looked concerned. "Ah, colonel, glad you could make it." Jack almost jumped at Dr Fraiser's voice, he had been so deep within himself. "And where is Dr Jackson? I know how much he hates coming here, but he should know by now that the post-mission checkup is not optional." As she was speaking, Janet Fraiser looked at each of the members of SG1 in turn. Colonel O'Neill looks like he wants the ground to open up and swallow him, she thought, Captain Carter looks like she is going to snap at someone and Teal'c... Janet looked closely at Teal'c. "Are you feeling okay Teal'c? Maybe I should examine you first. Follow me." With that the petite doctor turned abruptly, without waiting to see if the Jaffa followed - Teal'c took a last look towards the door, as if expecting Daniel to appear, before following. --------------------------------- "Take a seat Teal'c," said Janet,"you know what we have to do by now." Turning to a nearby cabinet for a pair of surgical gloves and a syringe, Janet missed the expression that flitted briefly across Teal'c's face - by the time she turned back to him, to take a blood sample, his face was once again impassive. As she moved closer to the Jaffa, Janet took a careful look at Teal'c's face. I was right, she thought, those are tears... "Teal'c, have you been... feeling upset recently?" "I have been feeling... strange, Doctor Fraiser. I do not understand what is going on. First Daniel Jackson and Colonel O'Neill...." Teal'c stopped, as though he had said more than he intended. "First Dr Jackson and Colonel O'Neill what, Teal'c? What has happened?" Teal'c looked down at his hands, then past them, to the floor, as if examining it. Janet waited patiently, knowing that she would only get from the Jaffa what he wanted to say, and that to push him would make him clam up. "When we were on the planet, Colonel O'Neill and Daniel Jackson.... They were in conflict with each other. Colonel O'Neill was very angry, and Daniel Jackson was... afraid. When I first saw them, I thought that they would fight." ---------------------------------- Outside the examination room, Jack and Carter waited to have their checkup. The usual post-mission banter was absent, and Daniel had still not appeared. Jack was starting to worry. "This is all your fault, colonel," Carter snapped, suddenly, shattering the uncomfortable silence in the room. "Captain?" "If you hadn't upset him on the planet, Daniel would be here getting his checkup. What were you thinking, threatening him like that?" Jack was stunned, and struggled to form a coherent answer to the accusations Carter was flinging at him, feeling all along that she was right and that he had behaved appallingly towards Daniel. Carter, however, took no notice of the startled expression on Jack's face, or the fact that Janet had come back and was staring at her with equal surprise. "I want to speak to both of you," said Janet, interrupting Carter's further accusations. "I need you to tell me exactly what happened on the planet, and anything you know about where Dr Jackson is." Both Jack and Carter stared at Janet for a moment, before both began to speak, simultaneously. "The colonel..." "Daniel..." "One at a time, please - you first Colonel O'Neill." Janet ignored the look of irritation that flashed across Carter's face, concentrating instead on what Jack was saying. ------------------------------- "...and then what happened, Captain?" "Well, Colonel O'Neill led us back to the 'Gate and we came back to the SGC, of course," snapped Carter. "Dr Jackson?" asked Janet, ignoring the way that Carter had spoken to her. "He ran out of the 'Gate room as soon as we arrived. Looks like he couldn't wait to be as far away from the colonel as possible," Carter concluded, in a sneering tone. Janet had noticed the expression on Jack's face when Carter had been speaking - she had also noticed the uncharacteristically quiet way in which he was listening to what was being said. Definitely something wrong with the colonel, Janet thought, normally it's all you can do to stop him making bad jokes. "Do either of you have any idea where Dr Jackson is now?" Both Jack and Carter shook their heads. "Right. I want blood samples from both of you and neither of you are to leave the base until I say you can. Is that understood?" ----------------------------------- Later that same afternoon, Janet found Jack, Carter and Teal'c in the briefing room, discussing the mission with General Hammond. Pausing just inside the door, Janet heard Jack finish his account of the mission, occasionally punctuated by scornful sounds from Carter, which the general seemed to be making an effort to overlook. Teal'c sat motionless, clearly not taking any interest in the events, and a variety of emotions were equally evident on his face. "You have something for us, Doctor?" asked the general, beckoning Janet to approach. "I have, sir. Blood tests on the three members of SG1 present indicate high levels of an unknown substance. Whatever it is, it's not from this planet, but I do know what it does. The substance affects the chemicals within the brain, specifically stimulating the areas responsible for the expression of emotion. As a result, it acts as a kind of amplifier, taking existing emotions and magnifying them to a frightening extent." "Thank you Doctor," said Hammond,"do you believe this substance is responsible for the events on the planet?" "It would seem likely, sir." "Then why weren't the natives affected? The colonel said that they were extrememly calm, almost passive." Janet thought for a moment, before answering. "Maybe that's a learned characteristic, sir. Imagine if this substance is widespread on the planet's surface, in the air, for example, then a society could only survive by developing a way of behaviour that minimised the creation of strong emotions. Otherwise, they would soon be destroyed, fighting among themselves." "Do you have an antidote, Doctor?" the general asked, clearly worried about the current situation with the three others seated round the briefing table. When Jack had been relating the events on the planet, his voice had been a monotone. Carter had barely been able to make a positive statement in relation to anything the colonel had said, and Teal'c had seemed almost in tears at times. "No, sir. Not yet, any way, but I would suggest that SG1 be confined to the base for their own safety - I'd like to keep them under observation. It may be that the effects will just wear off." "But what about Dr Jackson?" the general asked. "I believe every effort should be made to find Dr Jackson as soon as possible, sir. Has it been established that he has left the base?" "We're still searching the base, Doctor. I'll let you know as soon as I hear anything." With that, General Hammond turned to the rest of SG1, saying "You all heard the doctor. You are all confined to base for the time being. Dismissed." --------------------------------- Must find Daniel, Jack thought. Having left Carter and Teal'c in the corridor outside the briefing room, Jack headed towards the elevator, certain that he new where the missing anthropologist was, even though the search teams had so far failed to locate him. As well as being worried about Daniel, the way that Teal'c was acting concerned him too. Jack had never seen the Jaffa showing such overt emotions in all the time that he had known him. However, concerns for Daniel's well-being were currently foremost in Jack's mind. Where else would he go? As far as we know, he's still in the base..... Jack refused to think too much about how he was feeling, trying to damp down the waves of panic and guilt that threatened to overwhelm him. All the way to Daniel's office, Jack was uncertain what he would find, what reception he would get - after all, Daniel had all but run away from him in the 'Gate room! Finally Jack opened the door into Daniel's office, and flicked on the light. Empty. The computer was switched off, the piles of paper were undisturbed and even the half-drunk cup of coffee Daniel had left when Jack had come and practically dragged him to the briefing that morning was still there. Jack was about to leave, to continue his search elsewhere, when a faint noise made him pause. He concentrated, trying to locate the source of the sound. There it was again. It was coming from the corner of the room. Jack crept over, not wanting to startle Daniel, if it was him who was making the sound. As he drew nearer, Jack saw that someone was squashed into the gap between the cabinet and the wall. It was Daniel, gently rocking back and forth, his arms wrapped tightly round his knees - the sound that Jack had heard was Daniel bumping against the cabinet wall as he rocked. Jack's breath caught in his throat. For once, the usually decisive colonel was at a loss. Here was a man he considered a friend, clearly in anguish, and it was all his fault! Should he speak to Daniel, let him know he was there? How would Daniel react? Jack's mind screamed at him to go, to leave Daniel to his own devices, to get out of there! Taking a deep breath to calm himself, Jack moved away, taking a seat where he had a clear view of where Daniel was hidden. As he moved the chair slightly, its' legs scraped on the concrete floor, and Jack was suddenly aware that the sound from the corner of the room had stopped. He knows someone is here, thought Jack. What do I say? How do I start to tell him how sorry I am about all this? "Jack?" "Yeah, Daniel, it's me. Listen, we need to talk..." ------------------------------- Janet went looking for Teal'c and Carter, finally finding them in the messhall. Both seemed somewhat abashed, Teal'c clearly embarassed by his uncustomary display of emotions earlier, and Carter by the way that she had treated the colonel. "How are you both feeling? Any extreme emotions?" A shake of the head from both. "Good. It looks as though the worst of the effects are over. I'd like to do some follow-up tests, so if you can come by the infirmary in a while..." Once Janet had left, Teal'c finally spoke. "I must apologise, Captain Carter, for my behaviour earlier. I do not understand how I could lose control of my emotions so easily - I trained for years as a Jaffa to control such things. I am ashamed." "It's okay, Teal'c. We all went a bit wild there. I didn't realise that you were so unhappy here," said Carter. "I am not unhappy, Captain Carter, but I do miss my home and family sometimes. I believe that is the emotion that was amplified in my case. I am unaccustomed to being... unwell. Usually my Goa'uld larva helps me to deal with illness before it becomes... overwhelming." Teal'c paused, before continuing,"..but what of you, Captain Carter? You behaved in an unusual manner too." Carter blushed, looking down at the table. "I... I guess I let my protective feelings towards Daniel get the better of me, Teal'c. I'm not sure how the colonel will feel about it when this is all over." Carter sighed. "You were not responsible for what you said, Captain Carter." "Let's hope the colonel feels the same way you do, Teal'c, or my days with SG1 are numbered." Carter stood, suddenly. "Let's get back to the infirmary." ---------------------------------- "....and the doc says this stuff she found in our blood acts like a kind of amplifier, making our emotions more extreme." So far there had been very little response from Daniel, who was still curled up in the corner. Jack tried to take comfort from the fact that Daniel hadn't run out of the room when he knew who was in the office with him, but that didn't make him feel much better. "This conversation would be much easier if you'd come out of there Daniel." Jack tried to keep the tone of his voice light, but was painfully aware that it had cracked when he spoke Daniel's name. Come on Daniel, you've got to trust me a little, Jack thought. Suddenly Daniel emerged from his hiding-place. Jack suppressed a gasp, catching his first glimpse of his friend since he had fled from the 'Gate room. Daniel's face was pale, his eyes blodshot and red-rimmed, his hands were still shaking slightly. Instinctively Jack stood, wanting to help him, but hastily sat down again when he saw Daniel recoil slightly at his action. Daniel took a seat, Jack noticed, as far away from him as the tiny office would allow. "Jeez, Daniel. You look terrible. I don't know what to say... how can I tell you... how sorry I am about all of this? You've gotta believe..." Jack's voice began to crack again, and he ground to a halt, unsure what it was he wanted Daniel to believe. Daniel was just sitting there, listening to what Jack was saying, not responding, not even looking in his direction. "Help me out here, Daniel," Jack blurted out,"what do you want me to say? How sorry I am? Well, I am sorry... sorry that you can't trust me, that I managed to make you afraid of me. Most of all, I'm sorry that I blew it, okay?" "You said... you said there was something in our blood? Something that changed us?" Daniel's voice was a croak. Jack noticed that Daniel glanced in his direction when he spoke. At least he's talking to me, thought Jack, with an element of relief. "Yeah, Daniel, so the doc said." "And it made us feel things more strongly?" Jack nodded, uncertain where Daniel was going with this. "Then that means what I've been feeling is still real, doesn't it? I've been so afraid, Jack..." Daniel choked the last few words out. It took him a moment to regain his self-control. Jack waited, his own emotions a churning mixture of fear, guilt, concern and hope. If Daniel could at least tell him how he was feeling, surely that meant that things might be okay? Finally, Daniel started speaking again, uncertainly at first. "... I... I'm the one who should be apologising, Jack... I.." "What? What the hell are you talking about Daniel?" Jack burst in, unable to control his reaction to Daniel's words. "You want to apologise to me? Daniel, you were terrified... terrified of me! And you want to apologise..." Jack suddenly became aware that Daniel was looking at the floor again, unable to meet Jack's eyes. "Let me finish, Jack. Please..." Those five quiet words silenced Jack, making him swallow whatever he had planned to say next. "Jack. You must let me take some responsibility for how things are. You... what happened on the planet, it scared me. But instead of facing up to that, when part of me knew there was something wrong, I ran. So many times, Jack, you've said all that stuff about having to remember I'm part of a team, but when it came to it, I didn't act like I was part of anything! All I thought about was getting as far away as possible from..." "...from me," Jack hesitantly finished what Daniel was about to say. Daniel nodded sheepishly, glancing in Jack's direction as if trying to assess his reaction to the things he had said. "You've also forgotten the other stuff I keep telling you, Daniel. The stuff about you being a civilian and how it's my job to make sure you're okay... And today I blew it. How can I expect you to trust me when... when this is what happens?" Jack stood, wiping his hand across his face. "We need to get you to the infirmary, Daniel, get the doc to check you out. Can you make it there okay?" "I just need a minute alone, Jack. I'll be along shortly." "Okay, but if you're not there in ten minutes, I'm sending the men in white coats to come find you." Daniel managed, somehow, to crack a tiny smile at Jack's threat. Feeling a little better, Jack headed for the door, trying to suppress the almost overwhelming concern he still felt about Daniel. As he closed the door to Daniel's office behind him, Jack thought for a moment that he heard a voice, but decided not to go back and check. "But I do trust you..." ---------------------------------------- The next day saw SG1 gathered for a repeat performance of the debriefing that had been so emotional before. General Hammond sat, as usual, at the head of the table, and looked carefully at each member of SG1 in turn. Colonel O'Neill seemed a little subdued still, Teal'c was his usual composed self, Captain Carter looked a little flushed in the face and Dr. Jackson. Well, Dr. Jackson was present, that was the most that the general was able to convince himself of. The briefing itself was over in a matter of minutes, for once unpunctuated by Jack's bad jokes or Daniel's interruptions. Hammond confessed to himself that he was worried about SG1, having been fully briefed by a variety of people, including Dr Fraiser and Colonel O'Neill, on the events following SG1's return to the SGC. Time will tell, the general thought, how they handle this one. I just hope they manage to keep going as a team after all that has happened - I'd hate to lose any of them. Pushing back his chair, the general stood, taking a leisurely look again at SG1. "Your next mission is not for another 4 days, SG1. You have 48 hours R&R, make the most of it. Dismissed." As was customary, SG1 had stood when Hammond had left. After the door had shut behind him, Jack had sunk back into his seat with a sigh. Looking round at the other three people in the room, Jack gestured that they should take their seats again. Once they had done so, an awkward silence fell. "We're gonna have to talk about what happened yesterday some time, so maybe it ought to be now," Jack began, looking at each of his fellow team-members in turn. The overwhelming emotions of the previous day had been replaced by a certainty that he, as leader of SG1, had to act. Now what? he thought, Carter looks like she thinks I'm gonna shout at her, Teal'c just keeps staring at me, and Daniel... Daniel looks like he'd rather be anywhere else than here! "Sir?" It was Carter who had spoken, breaking the silence - as she spoke, she got up from her chair and stood at attention. Great, Jack thought, now she looks like she's facing a firing squad! "Captain? You have something you want to say?" "Yes, colonel. I want to apologise, sir, for the way I acted yesterday. I understand that I made things very difficult for you, at a time when you needed my support, so I would like your permission to ask General Hammond to transfer me to another SG team as soon as possible." "Permission denied, Captain. We have a problem and we're not going to solve it by running away...." As he spoke, a pang of guilt hit Jack, and he glanced at Daniel, to see if he had placed the same interpretation on the colonel's words. Jack was relieved to see that Daniel did not react at all. "Sit down, Carter. You're not going anywhere." "But, sir..." "I said, sit down! You weren't alone in acting like a jackass, Captain - the situation we're in won't be improved by any of us transferring out. We have to sort it, between us, or we might as well all go home." "But what I said..." "You were worried about Daniel... I was worried about Daniel... There is nothing to apologise about, Captain. I've apologised to Daniel about what happened on the planet, he's apologised to me for running off when we got back. We have to learn from this experience and move on." All the time Jack was speaking, he was checking the reactions of his team. Carter had visibly relaxed in her seat, and was nodding in agreement with the things Jack was saying. Daniel looked unhappy still, but it was nothing when compared to the state he had been in when the two of them had been in Daniel's office yesterday. Teal'c looked like he wanted to say something. "Teal'c?" "Colonel O'Neill, I too wish to apologise for my actions. I have shamed myself by losing control of my emotions in such a manner." "Aw, Teal'c... What did I just say? We all did things we regret, but now we have to deal with it and look forward. None of us were completely responsible for our actions, that... that stuff made us do things!" Jack looked round at the rest of SG1 - none of them looked completely convinced. Guess this is gonna take longer than I thought, Jack thought, with a sigh. "Now, get out of here all of you... Let's make the most of the R & R the general has given us. I'll see you all here in 2 days. Dismissed." Sweet, Jack thought, for once I get to have the last word... Jack sat and watched the rest of his team leave the briefing room. A small voice in the back of his mind told him that he hadn't solved the problem within SG1, merely delayed dealing with it. But that was a problem he could face, had to face, in the future. To be continued, in 'Repercussions'...

Disclaimer : Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. This story is written for entertainment purposes only - no money whatsoever has exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story-line are the property of the author - not to be archived elsewhere without permission.